Funny self-contradictions

If I have read the Bible correctly, I know many men who have never heard the name of Jesus Christ or have even rejected the official interpretation of Christianity will, probably, if Jesus came in our midst today in the flesh, be owned by him more than many of us.- Mahatma Gandhi

Sadly, Dave is under the delusion that the Bible is the absolute Word of God, and only the Bible can guide humanity. Dave is under the delusion that everything else is nonsense. Dave is under the delusion that people who don’t accept Jesus are going to hell. Dave is under the delusion that God gave us permission to kill innocent animals for food. Dave’s ignorance knows no bounds.

I know his mind cannot be changed because he has been completely brainwashed by false doctrines and false teachers to believe in the false idea of Biblical perfection. But, I do pray that in his next life, it will not be the same, and I hope Dave finds the true path.

Here is another list of self-contradictions from the Bible which may make you chuckle. Unless you are Dave, that is.

Number 1- Why did Jesus come to this world?

John 9: 39: I came to this world to judge…

John 12: 47: I came, not to judge the world, but to save it.

Number 2: Should every man bear his own burden?

Galatians 6: 2: Help to carry one another’s burdens and in this way you will obey the law of Christ.

Galatians 6: 5: For everyone has to carry his own load.

Number 3- Should we publicize the good things we do?

Matthew 5: 16: In the same way your light must shine before people, so that they will see the good things you do and praise your Father in heaven.

Matthew 6: 1- 2: Make certain you do not perform your religious duties in public so that people will see what you do.  If you do these things publicly, you will not have any reward from your Father in heaven. So when you give something to a needy person, do not make a big show of it, as the hypocrites do in the houses of worship and on the streets.

Number 4- How are enemies to be treated?

Proverbs 24: 17: Don’t be glad when your enemy meets disaster, and don’t rejoice when he stumbles.

Psalms 58: 10: The righteous will be glad when they see sinners punished; they will wade through the blood of the wicked.

Number 5- How should Christians treat their parents?

Exodus 20: 12: Respect your father and your mother, so that you may live a long time in the land that I am giving you.

Matthew 10: 35: I came to set sons against their fathers, daughters against their mothers, daughters-in-law against their mothers-in-law; …

Number 6- How should we respond to foolish people asking silly questions?

Proverbs 26: 4: If you answer a silly question, you are just as silly as the person who asked it.

Proverbs 26: 5: Give a silly answer to a silly question, and the one who asked it will realize that he’s not as clever as he thinks.

Number 7- Were Adam and Eve created at the same time?

Genesis 1: 27: So God created human beings, making them to be like himself. He created them male and female, blessed them, and said…

Genesis 2: 21- 22: Then the Lord God made the man fall into a deep sleep, and while he was sleeping, He took out one of the man’s ribs and closed up the flesh. He formed a woman out of the rib and brought her to him.

Number 8- Should Christians look for a wife?

Proverbs 18: 22: Find a wife and you find a good thing; it shows that the Lord is good to you.

1 Corinthians 7: 27: Are you unmarried? Then don’t look for a wife.

Number 9- Can the blood of innocent animals take away sins?

Hebrews 10: 4: For the blood of bulls and goats can never take away sins.

Leviticus 5: 10: Then he shall offer the second bird as a burnt offering, according to the regulations. In this way the priest shall offer the sacrifice for the man’s sin, and he will be forgiven.

Number 10- Should children be punished because of the crimes their parents committed?

Deuteronomy 24: 16: Parents are not to be put to death for crimes committed by their children, and children are not to be put to death for crimes committed by their parents; a person is to be put to death only for a crime he himself has committed.

Leviticus 26: 21- 22: If you continue to resist me and refuse to obey me, I will again increase your punishment seven times. I will send dangerous animals among you, and they will kill your children, destroy your livestock, and leave so few of you that your roads will be deserted.

Isn’t it laughable that even though the Bible is full of hypocrisy and madness, Dave and other such people keep defending it as if it is not?

So, for Dave and all his chums, don’t forget to offer a ram as a sacrifice to your god tonight. If you don’t, he will be angry and may bring a curse upon you. That’s all.

Blessed are the merciful.